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Tabitha adores her tank. She spends hours in it, plotting world domination, I’m sure. At the very least she has her eyes on storming the neighbor’s flat and claiming their territory as her own.
Right, good, okay. I’ve just got pizza. We could catch up on Glee if, um, you wanted?
Does she really? I’m delighted to hear. Tabby has such great ambition, she’s a girl after my own heart. I’m proud of her, really, she ought to storm your neighbors flat. I’ve always found them incredibly annoying.
Pizza and Glee? How lovely, we’re so behind. Maybe I’ll even bring those shoes you got me. That went well last time, didn’t it?
They are a bit, um, loud. Not that way, just… I mean, Top Gear is good and all, but must it really be watched at that volume? It is a little excessive. And then there was that one time I caught Mrs. Borrell rummaging through my mail, which really was quite rude. So, I suppose I’ll let it slide if you and Tabitha decided to, um, retaliate a little.
And, um, oh yes… um, yes. You should bring the shoes. That went, um, well. Definitely well. More then well. It went… good.
No, darling, Top Gear should never be watched at that volume. They aren’t even that old, honestly, hearing aides, it’s not hard. Some people. If they are being too rude to you I can always … fix it you know. I doubt they’d be missed.
Shoes it is. Maybe we can give your dreadful neighbors a legitimate reason to have the volume up that loud on their television set.
Oh, um, sorry I’ve been a bit… not around. Morris has been ill so I’ve been pulling extra shifts all week. Tabitha’s been missing you.
Semtex. Right. Yes. If you wanted to come over we could, um, bake a cake. If you wanted.
The cake baking is not a euphemism for bomb consturction. Just to be, um, clear.
Malcolm, my love! You have no idea how pleased I am to see you!
They really do run you ragged over there, but that’s just because you’re ever so good at your job. I remember that Morris chap, all sausage fingers, it’s a wonder he can perform an autopsy at all. I’ve missed darling Tabby as well, has she been enjoying her tank?
A cake? Really? That sounds lovely dearest. And yes, I’m happy with making a real one, with frosting and what have you and not nitroglycerin. I’ll not extend my apparent “corruption” of you to getting into making explosives.
I can put off blowing someone up, I’d much prefer your company anyway.
Tabitha adores her tank. She spends hours in it, plotting world domination, I’m sure. At the very least she has her eyes on storming the neighbor’s flat and claiming their territory as her own.
Right, good, okay. I’ve just got pizza. We could catch up on Glee if, um, you wanted?
Does she really? I’m delighted to hear. Tabby has such great ambition, she’s a girl after my own heart. I’m proud of her, really, she ought to storm your neighbors flat. I’ve always found them incredibly annoying.
Pizza and Glee? How lovely, we’re so behind. Maybe I’ll even bring those shoes you got me. That went well last time, didn’t it?
My My my, nothing but complete silence from both my sniper and my little pathologist.
If I were the type to get sentimental I would say I was hurt.
But mostly I’m just bored.
Well, it’s been a bit since I’ve made anyone a semtex vest, so there’s always that I suppose.
Oh, um, sorry I’ve been a bit… not around. Morris has been ill so I’ve been pulling extra shifts all week. Tabitha’s been missing you.
Semtex. Right. Yes. If you wanted to come over we could, um, bake a cake. If you wanted.
The cake baking is not a euphemism for bomb consturction. Just to be, um, clear.
Malcolm, my love! You have no idea how pleased I am to see you!
They really do run you ragged over there, but that’s just because you’re ever so good at your job. I remember that Morris chap, all sausage fingers, it’s a wonder he can perform an autopsy at all. I’ve missed darling Tabby as well, has she been enjoying her tank?
A cake? Really? That sounds lovely dearest. And yes, I’m happy with making a real one, with frosting and what have you and not nitroglycerin. I’ll not extend my apparent “corruption” of you to getting into making explosives.
I can put off blowing someone up, I’d much prefer your company anyway.
Malcolm dearest, I saw this today and it made me think of your darling Tabitha
Do you think she’ll like it? I just thought she would look ever so sweet in it.
That’s ace! She’d love it Jen! I’m fairly certain Tabitha has a plan for world domination, and I know I shouldn’t let you enable her, but I’m afraid I have to admit that I, um, that I can’t really say no to either of you.
Thanks for thinking of her, as she does loves you so.
I do believe that Tabitha’s taste for World domination is one of the reasons I am so fond of her, I do have to admire that level of ambition. I’ve promised her that she can have Russia, unless of course, you wanted it, darling. Although I was rather planning on giving you France, I seem to remember you having a thing for Paris?
Aw, do give darling Tabby my love too, and let her know I’ll be bringing her present round soon.
Malcolm dearest, I saw this today and it made me think of your darling Tabitha
Do you think she’ll like it? I just thought she would look ever so sweet in it.
Okay. The “live in one” is right here and really doesn’t appreciate you insinuating that Charlotte take advantage of me, Moriarty.
And please stop informing the world about your current corruption of poor Malcolm Hooper. He’s such a nice young man and I’d hate to see what your toxic influence could do to him.
Oh Doctor Watson, as usual you are ever the witty conversationalist. I can see why Charlotte finds you so charming.
Now now, I can assure you that Malcolm Hooper in no way disapproves of my frequent “corruption” of him, quite the opposite in fact.
And you, Moriarty, are a peach. Simply a joy.
You know what I really didn’t need to know? That. That right there.
But she really is though. I know you don’t think so, but… she is. Jen is probably the nicest girl I’ve ever dated.
And I’m not being “corrupted”. There’s no “corruption” going on, unless I’m correct in assuming all this “corruption” talk is a euphemism in which case I… In which case any “corruption” is a private matter and I’d appreciate it if, um, there could be fewer people discussing said “corruption”.
Well kids, the boy has spoken.
no no darling, I’m sure they weren’t using any sort of innuendo and that they legitimately think I am slowly turning you into some sort of criminal mastermind, or a colombian drug lord or something. You know how ridiculous those two get.
(Source: the-names-charlotte-holmes)
What are you on about *now* Moriarty?
I have no desire to *play* with Joanna, and I certainly didn’t send you a cake.
Oh, you’re right, that was me who did that.
I am so terribly forgetful sometimes…. Malcolm darling, I brought cake!
Oh, cake! What’s the occasion? Oh, oh. Um, it’s… thank you.
Do you like it? I do hope you like it. Nothing is too extravagant for my little pathologist
next time I’m planning on getting a sky writer.
Oh, um…
Thank you?
Oh Charlotte, don’t antagonize my pet just because yours won’t play with you.
I appreciate the cake though, very thoughtful of you.
What are you on about *now* Moriarty?
I have no desire to *play* with Joanna, and I certainly didn’t send you a cake.
Oh, you’re right, that was me who did that.
I am so terribly forgetful sometimes…. Malcolm darling, I brought cake!
Oh, um…
Thank you?
Oh Charlotte, don’t antagonize my pet just because yours won’t play with you.
I appreciate the cake though, very thoughtful of you.
I… didn’t walk back to mine like that…?
Right, okay, I did. But only because I couldn’t find it and I was late for my shift and I didn’t want to wake you up and now I’m rather embarrassed.
Oh my God, you actually did. And here I had thought that maybe some random man’s shoe had just *HAPPENED* to wind up under my bed
Kitten, for goodness sake, just wake me up next time. I can hardly have my pet wandering around London in the wee hours of morning in such a state, honestly now sweetheart.
